trigger warning for the video link
I had the most horrifying experience in my soc of gender class yesterday. The rape discussion finally arose. We were discussing an article about fraternities and rape, but it really turned to a video the professor showed. With the power of youtube, I can show it now.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAlRZ8CHgBU
We had a bunch of classmates say things like it wasn’t rape, she wasn’t struggling, she didn’t say no. I freaked out, to say the least. My professor brought up good points like what if something’s stuffed in my mouth? I can’t say no then.
Considering the lesson was about rape culture, I felt free to tell them that their comments were perpetuating the rape culture. Saying things like, “It’s a 50/50 split in responsibility” or “if you knew that’s a dangerous place, why did you go”? I told them it was disgusting to say those thing. Frankly, if I want to go out and dress the way I want and drink, then I should be able to do so freely.
Because if “THOSE” women had the agency to dress and drink and go to “dangerous” places, then those men had the agency to rape. As a patriarchal society, our society is conducive to creating rape culture.
We say things like, “well, what was she wearing when she was raped”? Which was key for a case in which the judge ruled a woman COULDN’T be raped while wearing skinny jeans, because it takes too much time to take it off, she must have assisted him.
We say, “well, was she drink”? Well, I’m sorry, being inebriated might have caused me to say dumb things or something (obvious I don’t drink?) but that doesn’t give someone the right to steal from me or touch me or violate me. EVER!
And I told them, I’m sorry that my friend (I didn’t name names) was such a seductive child that her family member violated her. I’m sorry that my cousins friend was such a bad girl, passing the handball court that you need to to get to the train (the common form of transportation in New York City) that she was raped and murdered. I’m sorry that you feel that way. And as another classmate said
“I hope you’re not on my jury if something ever happens to me!”
me neither classmate…
(Source: ms-solarmc)
